It amazes me in a bizarre way how different I am during breaks. The sense of being at ease, being complete, being happy. I don't know what it is. When I'm at school I don't feel unhappy or unsatisfied, honestly I just don't feel. Everything moves so fast. One day melts into another of school, friends, activities, assignments, papers, exams, and before I know it, a weekend has come again, and then even faster, another month slips away. These past four years have honestly been a whirlwind of constant movement. However, it is these breaks that I value so much; where I can see the whole picture of my life, understand why I am on this earth, what my value is to society, how I can serve others and ultimately how through all of this I can attain my happiness.
It scares me, that being busy can take away from so much clarity, so much perspective, and traps me into the mundane and the material. Right now its school, but when work becomes my life, will I be the same? Will I lose these perspectives and realizations, and when will I find the time to recuperate? I won't be able to have these long breaks to find myself, so what happens then?
My constant prayer is this, how I feel right now, the utter bliss, the ease, the reality of who I actually am, I won't lose ever, regardless of the pressure, the busy, the crazy.
Its also exciting. Knowing what my future could be like if I try to be more present, that ideas will constantly engulf me, spirituality will rejuvenate me, and that I can actually enjoy being around my loved ones. Everyone proclaims that college is the best four years of your life, an escape from responsibilities, from reality. Well, I disagree. Reality is a journey of its own and I am excited to begin it.
Cheers to growing up and finding clarity.
It scares me, that being busy can take away from so much clarity, so much perspective, and traps me into the mundane and the material. Right now its school, but when work becomes my life, will I be the same? Will I lose these perspectives and realizations, and when will I find the time to recuperate? I won't be able to have these long breaks to find myself, so what happens then?
My constant prayer is this, how I feel right now, the utter bliss, the ease, the reality of who I actually am, I won't lose ever, regardless of the pressure, the busy, the crazy.
Its also exciting. Knowing what my future could be like if I try to be more present, that ideas will constantly engulf me, spirituality will rejuvenate me, and that I can actually enjoy being around my loved ones. Everyone proclaims that college is the best four years of your life, an escape from responsibilities, from reality. Well, I disagree. Reality is a journey of its own and I am excited to begin it.
Cheers to growing up and finding clarity.
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