Uncover Within

My birthday is my favorite day of the year. I can pretend to be above it all, so exalted, so worldly, so cultured that something as trivial as my age increasing would have no affect on me at all. But, one of my resolutions was to be unapologetic of who I am. I don't have a shy, under-the-radar, intellectual, artistic, brooding personality. In fact, even the fact that I blog goes against the stereotype that fits my description. The description of the loud, social one, constantly trying to please, constantly seeking attention, and constantly exaggerating every situation in my life. But thats okay. I think this birthday especially is showing me that we're not picture perfect people that fit in picture perfect little boxes all tied up with picture perfect ribbons. We're complicated. We're mean and nice, we're shallow and introspective, crazy and simple, confused and focused. We are so much, so little, and everything in between; we are the grey, trying to live bl...

It amazes me in a bizarre way how different I am during breaks. The sense of being at ease, being complete, being happy. I don't know what it is. When I'm at school I don't feel unhappy or unsatisfied, honestly I just don't feel. Everything moves so fast. One day melts into another of school, friends, activities, assignments, papers, exams, and before I know it, a weekend has come again, and then even faster, another month slips away. These past four years have honestly been a whirlwind of constant movement. However, it is these breaks that I value so much; where I can see the whole picture of my life, understand why I am on this earth, what my value is to society, how I can serve others and ultimately how through all of this I can attain my happiness. It scares me, that being busy can take away from so much clarity, so much perspective, and traps me into the mundane and the material. Right now its school, but when work becomes my life, will I be the same? Will I lose...

res·o·lu·tion ˌrezəˈlo͞oSH(ə)n/ noun 1 . a firm decision to do or not to do something. So...I guess this is why they call it New Years Resolutions. A decision sorry, a FIRM decision to do something (or not). I could make this post really sentimental on all that has happened to me this year. It was a year of growing, and then being childish again, for feeling super intelligent, and then being so dumb. A year of happiness and a lot of sorrow, of new beginnings and some blissful endings, new adventures and the same routine. Reflecting on this year makes me realize that every year isn't so different from the past, what changes is US, how we look at every step, every moment, and how we capture and learn from it, or don't. The moments shape us and establish our ever-growing identity. So this post is a reflection of how my identity has grown this year and how I am resolving for it to continue to grow in the coming year.  This past year I became.... S...